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February 10, 2005

久しぶりだー

こういう人っていない?
本人はすごく真剣で、一生懸命で、確かにいろいろ頑張っている。
皆が面倒くさがって手をつけないこと、責任をとりたくないから触れたくないこと、、、
などに進んで手をつけて大変なことを買って出て、それで大変な思いをする。
それなのに、その人の努力は報われない。
誰にも感謝されない。
それどころかその逆だったりする。
(もう誰のこと話しているかわかるかもしれないね。。)

そう。
私の身近にもいる。。
特に自分にとっては、息苦しい存在。
「そんな大変ならやらなければいいじゃん」
いつも大変そうな顔して、自分が苛つかれてるみたいに感じる。

しかも、ほんと、なぜか努力が報われてないような気がするんだよね。
誰も心から感謝してないように見えるし。
口ではありがとう、助かる、と皆から口々に言われてるけど、
全然皆ありがたそうじゃないように見える。。
だから、本人も、
「私だけこんなに大変な思いをしてる」
「どうして、私だけこんな思いしなければいけないの?こんなに頑張ってるのに」
ときっと思ってるんだろう。

使命感に燃え、「自分がやらなければ」という思いが強く、
でも、周りにはそのありがたさは伝わらない。
せいぜい「やれやれお疲れさまだね」くらいに心底は
思っていたり、
私みたいに、息苦しさが伝わってきて、迷惑したり。

人と人ってなんなんだろう。。
と、ふと思った。

|

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